So … Who’s Next?

All 13 hours of the Michael Jackson concert death celebration gave me an unoriginal thought. I know it’s not unique to have a celebrity death pool. I know there are scores of Web sites dedicated to the countdown of Britney’s demise or the death of Abe Vigoda. Actually, is that guy still alive? If a quasi-celebrity dies and nobody remembers who that guy was, did he really die?

With the recent death of Steve McNair, Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, Billy Mays, and some black white singer from Indiana, the entire state of California must be holding their collective breath. Who’s next?

Probably someone like Lindsey Lohan. And then people will lament the death of a great talent taken too soon. Then she will be treated like Norma Jean Monroe. When in fact Lilo is a talentless, boobful idiot. I wonder if MM was really a worthless curvy drunk/druggie. And all the beautiful 30-something bloggers decried the hyperbolic treatment of a crappy actress.

Or maybe someone really famous, who is taken too soon, who has actual talent, and didn’t fondle pre-teen boys (allegedly). I could see Leonardo DiCaprio going. He’s been invisible for years. Except that he dumped Bar Refaeli. Let me repeat that — Leo D-U-M-P-E-D Bar Refaeli. God wouldn’t dump Bar Refaeli. Hell, even I wouldn’t get tired of her talking about Palestine and the mother land and The Daily Show. Leo’s gonna die of stupidity or too much gay.

That being said, I would guess Liz Taylor is next. She’s just too weird now. It was an acceptable weird when her bff Mike Jackson was still breathing through his one nostril. She’s the goofiest kat alive right now. So she better watch out for wet linoleum.